Milos -> random stuff

New version of an old tale

Mon, 09 Nov 2009 10:15:07 -0500

New version of an old tale

Washington Post's Mensa Invitational

Tue, 03 Nov 2009 11:54:00 -0500

Here’s the Washington Post’s Mensa Invitational which once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.

The winners are:

1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.

2. Ignoranus: A person who’s both stupid and an asshole.

3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people which stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn’t get it.

9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

11. Karmageddon: It’s like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it’s, like, a serious bummer.

12. Decafalon (n.): The gruelling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.

13. Glibido: All talk and no action.

14. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

15. Arachnoleptic Fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you’ve accidentally walked through a spider web.

16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

17. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you’re eating.

The Washington Post has also published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words. And the winners are:

1. Coffee, n. The person upon whom one coughs.

2. Flabbergasted, adj. Appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained.

3. Abdicate, v. To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

4. esplanade, v. To attempt an explanation while drunk.

5. Willy-nilly, adj. Impotent.

6. Negligent, adj. Absent mindedly answering the door when wearing only a nightgown .

7. Lymph, v. To walk with a lisp.

8. Gargoyle, n. Olive-flavored mouthwash.

9. Flatulence, n. Emergency vehicle that picks up someone who has been run over by a steamroller.

10. Balderdash, n. A rapidly receding hairline.

11. Testicle, n. A humorous question on an exam.

12. Rectitude, n. The formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.

13. Pokemon, n. A Rastafarian proctologist.

14. Oyster, n. A person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.

15. Frisbeetarianism, n. The belief that, after death, the soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.

16. Circumvent, n. An opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.

Google Analytics - Beat that! :-)

Fri, 06 Feb 2009 16:08:16 -0500

Google Analytics - Beat that! :-)

Medical advancements

Mon, 12 Jan 2009 11:07:00 -0500

A Japanese doctor said, ‘Medicine in my country is so advanced that we can take a kidney out of one man, put it in another, and have him looking for work in six weeks.’

A German doctor said, ‘That’s nothing, we can take a lung out of one person, put it in another, and have him looking for work in four weeks.’

A British doctor said, ‘In my country, medicine is so advanced that we can take half of a heart out of one person, put it in another, and have
them both looking for work in two weeks.’

A Texas doctor, not to be outdone said, ‘You guys are way behind. We took a man with no brains out of Texas , put him in the White House, and now half the country is looking for work.

Marseille ultra Santos Mirasierra has today been sentenced to...

Fri, 05 Dec 2008 16:00:00 -0500

Marseille ultra Santos Mirasierra has today been sentenced to three and a half years in prison for his involvement in the crowd riots during the Atlético Madrid match. You can see him pushing then hitting a cop at 1 minute and 30 seconds mark in this video.

They are setting examples everywhere.

Let me Google that for you

Wed, 19 Nov 2008 23:00:12 -0500

Let me Google that for you

New Twitter (error?) message

Tue, 18 Nov 2008 11:31:30 -0500

New Twitter (error?) message

Fix your own damn computer!

Tue, 18 Nov 2008 11:30:49 -0500

Fix your own damn computer!

Is that a flotation device?

Mon, 10 Nov 2008 23:42:40 -0500

Is that a flotation device?

Thomas Paine, author of “Common Sense,” returns to...

Tue, 16 Sep 2008 22:39:19 -0400

Thomas Paine, author of “Common Sense,” returns to modern times

Battle at Kruger

Wed, 16 Jul 2008 00:11:14 -0400

Battle at Kruger

He (and everyone else who passed this Bill) has no shame. They...

Tue, 08 Jul 2008 15:58:00 -0400

He (and everyone else who passed this Bill) has no shame. They should ALL be publicly embarrassed and indicted.

R.I.P. George Carlin

Mon, 23 Jun 2008 09:07:47 -0400

R.I.P. George Carlin

Funny Mercedes Benz commercial

Wed, 18 Jun 2008 10:55:10 -0400

Funny Mercedes Benz commercial

“Watch the official video for “Pork and Beans”...

Fri, 23 May 2008 12:33:50 -0400

“Watch the official video for “Pork and Beans” from Weezer starring some familiar YouTube faces.”

Radio Host Kevin James Walks into a Smackdown

Fri, 16 May 2008 14:24:19 -0400

Radio Host Kevin James Walks into a Smackdown

MUTO a wall-painted animation by...

Tue, 13 May 2008 19:37:26 -0400

MUTO a wall-painted animation by BLU

Coca Cola Train - Euro 2008

Mon, 12 May 2008 08:51:49 -0400

Coca Cola Train - Euro 2008

Fizikela - Nakajima crash at Formula One Turkish Grand Prix

Sun, 11 May 2008 14:06:00 -0400

Fizikela - Nakajima crash at Formula One Turkish Grand Prix

"There is nothing so useless as doing efficiently that which should not be done at all."

Sun, 11 May 2008 11:58:28 -0400

“There is nothing so useless as doing efficiently that which should not be done at all.”

- Peter Drucker